Relee the Squirrel's Domain

All About The Army of Cuteness

by Relee the Squirrel

The military organization in my story Army of Cuteness, seems to be of particular interest to a lot of people. I've put some thought into it, and not all of it will be likely to be exposed through the story.

By reading this you will learn about the nature of the Happiness Liberation Movement as well as their methods and origin.


The Happiness Liberation Movement was founded in the realm of Cutopia, a plane that exists in the realm of dreams. Cutopia was created by a confluence of cuteness that congealed into a solid plane and began assimilating base matter and ideas into its collective existance. The natural form of creatures from Cutopia is as a dream, but when they manifest physically they are made entirely of a collection of substances with similar properties to polymers. The materials are mostly plastic, rubber, and artificial fluffy fur in our world. They have strange properties however and are animated on their own accord. As such it's possible for them to digest and assimilate matter and energy equivalents from any plane they visit, gradually cutifying a plane and drawing it into the Cutopian Confluence where it becomes a permenant part of that plane.

As a people, Cutopians are pacifists. Most will never leave Cutopia unless removed, though if forcibly removed they will passively and eagerly follow their nature in whatever environment they are placed in. If attacked they will usually run or try to negotiate or make friends, but very few will actually fight back.

The Happiness Liberation Movement is a small extremist faction among the bulk of the Cutopian population. They are an expansionist movement that actively seeks out and assimilates planes and universes into the Cutopian confluence. Some work in passive ways, setting up voulentary Cutopian assimilation camps and establishing Cutopian Cults on worlds, while others raise armies and invade. Often the two work in tandem, the Happiness Liberation Army coming into play after the local population begins armed resistance to the assimilation of their world. Naturally, not all universes are as simple as ours, nor as complex, yet the Happiness Liberation Army works to bring all things into the fold.

Most people and things that are cutified by the HLA do not join it; rather they become pacificstic like the normal people of Cutopia and will live happily there either by escaping with the army through portals or by bringing their home-world into the Cutopian confluence.


The military organization of the Happiness Liberation Army is extremely open-ended. Every Cutopian is capable of operating both as soldier and officer, and they have very lax information control. All Cutopians in an HLA unit will know both the intentions and the plans of their unit, and if any of them are seperated they will continue with thier plans no matter what.

Ranks are denoted by a marking, usually a tummy-symbol for plushies or a mark on the face or tush in the case of dolls. The actual names and positions of the ranks are established during the initial phases of invasion, and traditionally mimic the organizational structures of groups on that world. On Earth and around western-esque cultures they use mish-mash military ranks.

The actual force in command of the HLA are a handful of powerful elder cutes, divine-level entities from Cutopia who never physically engage in warfare or struggle, and provide an unassailable high command in the heart of cuteness.


A signature feature of note in the HLA are the living buildings. On the plane of Cutopia most buildings are constructed of base materials and love, but the HLA utilizes the larger Cutopians as mobile buildings. These Cutopians are able to re-shape their internal structure at will and can manage their internal spaces extremely well, however they only have enough focus to either have a normal body or a building body, and cannot perform other tasks while maintaining rooms and people inside.

Cutopians are able to digest-assimilate people rapidly by having the giant cutopians dissolve a room into base-stuffing along with the people within, but this is not done except in case of an emergency. The HLA prefers to win over the hearts and minds of people through exposure to Cutopian culture and a form of brain-washing. People will usually be left in their normal or slightly altered forms untill they specifically ask to be made into Cutopians. Special exceptions are made for tough cases or people of special talents or abilities. Wizards, Scientists, Craftsmen, Artists, and beings with exceptional natural gifts and talents are all singled out for excessive exposure to Cutopian nature and if they do not react favourably they will be forced to accept the ways of cuteness, joy, and happiness.


The philosophy of Cuteness, Joy, and Happiness which the HLA follows is deceptively simple. They believe that cuteness is the ultimate form of existance, and that all suffering is caused by a lack of cuteness. They also believe that heartfelt and passionate expression of joy is neccesary to release your inner cuteness. Happiness comes from following the path of Cuteness by expressing your inner Joy. Expressing feelings and emotions is one of the most important things to Cutopians. If they believe someone is holding back their emotions they will do everything they can to force it out of them. Much of the 'deprogramming' that the HLA does to people in its re-education training centers is to convince people that holding in their feelings is wrong and hurts everybody. They also learn how to properly express emotions, making them as visible as possible.


The physical nature of Cutopians appears as a variety of plastics and rubbers, however the fibers of stuffing that make up the inside of all material Cutopians is actually a form of cute-life itself. If it is seperated from a cute-lifeform, as is common for fluff-bearing plants in Cutopia, it will act on its own accord in most situations. Other Cutopian food products have a similar effect, as they're all made out of the base energy wave of cutopian matter and energy, the cutie. Cutie particles usually form either as a white fibrous substance called stuffing, which is used for filling plushies and dolls who live in Cutopia, as well as a liquid form which is generated inside the bodies of Cutopian animals. These materials are the very essence of cuteness made manifest, and anything exposed to them will be assimiliated on a microscopic scale. In the nature of Cutopia, these materials condense and weave together, forming the basic fabrics and plastics that all cutopians are made out of and use to build their homes.



In case anybody decides to use Cutopia in a D&D campaign, I'd like to provide this handy little planar notation guide. ^.^

Cutopia Traits
* Normal Gravity
* Normal Time
* Infinite Size
* Divinely Morphic
* Minor positive-dominant
* Mildly Neutral-aligned
* Normal Magic

The Cutopian Confluence is coterminous with the Astral plane but not any other plane.

All Content Copyright Arthur Payne, AKA Relee the Squirrel

Last Update: January 6, 2009